True Support/الدعم الحقيقي

True Support/الدعم الحقيقي

The following article was originally written in Arabic and was translated to English by Ahmad Abojaradeh. If you find any mistakes please let us know in the comments below and we'll be happy to fix it ASAP.

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"Why are you so pessimistic?" "Why are you so moody?" "Why do you walk like an old person?" "You're not religious like you used to or else Satan wouldn't have made you sad like this!" I used to hear these questions, phrases, and accusations every time I went into a low energy/depressive state.

From the deepest parts of me I want to tell everyone, including some medical professionals and supporters: work with me as if I was human with the right to live a normal and healthy life, without passing judgment on me and so many others.

Imagine working with someone who has had a body part amputated. Would you ask why their arms were amputated? Telling them, they deserved the amputation? That they brought this on themselves? Well, that's what you ask me day in and day out.

I'm not asking for you to heal me, fix any of my problems, or even support me. I just want to be safe from you.

If you open the internet, anywhere on social media, you'll find pictures of people who are said to never be at risk of dying from suicide, they're laughing, and suddenly you find out they're dead.

You ask how? And why? They were laughing. They were perfectly normal. Well, it's because we haven't built a space where people can talk about these things, where they're accepted, and they're permitted to share what's going on with them.

Within a state of low energy/depressive state, I am terrified of your reactions to everything.

By writing this, I want to send two messages:

The first for people out there: If you see someone you love struggling with a challenge, skip the judgment and the statements filled with hate I mentioned above. Sometimes it's better to say nothing if you see someone exhausted and living through a challenge. Trust me; silence could be so much better than all the words out there. Support, love, and compassion are communicated beyond words; they are felt before they are spoken.

The second for others living through depression: No one will save you but you. After suffering from depression for twenty years, I finally took charge of my life when I decided to be there for me, to save me, and to find the things that work for me secretly.

I wish you a fulfilling and happy life.

الدعم الحقيقي

"ليش انتي متشائمة؟"

"انتي نكدة!"

"ليش هيك بتمشي زي العجوز"

"انتي بطلتي متدينة زي زمان ولا ماكان الشيطان خلاكي حزينة هيك"

كل هالجمل وغيرها كتير كانت تنحكالي كل ما أدخل بنوبة اكتئاب.. نفسي أحكي للكل بما فيهم بعض الأطباء والمعالجيين النفسيين : تعاملوا معنا على اننا أنفس بشرية الها حق تعيش حياة طبيعية وسليمة .. بدووون ما تصدروا أحكام علينا .

تخيل تشوف واحد ايده مقطوعة .. وتحكيله ييي ليش ايدك مقطوعة أو انت بتستاهل انت الي جبته لحالك .. هاد بالضبط نفس معنى حكيكم يلي فوق .. احنا مش طالبين لا توقفوا جنبا ولا حتى تدعمونا ولا اشي .. بس كفوا أذاكم وألسنتكم عنا ..

لو بتفتحوا النت شي مرة وبتشوفوا صور لناس قيل ما ينتحروا .. وشوفوا كيف وجوههم بتضحك .. وفجأة ما بتسمع إلا خبر انتحارهم .. طيب كيف؟! وليش؟ هلأ كان معنا يضحك. طبيعي يا سيدي .. لأنه ما حد بيتقبل أو بيسمح لهدول الناس يعبروا عن حالهم وألمهم وحزنهم وتعبهم النفسي ..

احنا في نوبات الاكتئاب بنتقوقع على أنفسنا خوفا عليها منكم ..

بالنهاية انا بدي اوجه رسالتين

الاولى للناس : إذا شفتوا حد قريب منكم بتحبوه عنجد وحسيتوه بيعاني .. بلاها كلمات اللوم الي ذكرت أمثلتها فوق .. مافي داعي تحكوا اي شي اذا شفتوا حد تعبان أو في نوبة اكتئاب .. صدقوني الصمت قد يكون أفضل من كثير من الكلام .. ومشاعر الدعم والحب والأمان بتوصل بدون مرسال .. وحتى لو مانطقتوا ولا بكلمة. .. الدعم النفسي الصادق بينحس قبل ما ينشاف ..

الرسالة التانية للناس المصابة باكتئاب : ما حد رح يساعدكم غيركم .. بعد معاناة عشرين سنة تقريبا مع الاكتئاب .. ما بدأت أتحسن إلا لما قررت أساعد نفسي بنفسي وأبدأ أتعالج بقرار شخصي وسري أيضا ..

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